Brigit BitarJust another WordPress weblog

So I get told a lot that my phobias are irrational… Maybe they are, but to me its serious business!

Number one – my absolute biggest fear! ELEVATORS. Seriously, even writing the word makes my heart beat a little faster. I’m not quite sure what it is about elevators which frightens me so much… I know that I don’t like the idea of being enclosed inside a moving box which is in turn enclosed in a large concrete/brick shaft. It’s not the cliche of the elevator snapping from its cables which frightens me, (although they wouldn’t be too fun) – but I know they’re fitted with a breaking system. I am a tad claustrophobic but I don’t think it’s that entirely…

Watching someone in an elevator on the television even makes my heart start beating – it’s utter craziness! I’ve tried to conquer the fear many times in the past and it usually ends in tears.

I absolutely will NOT get inside an elevator with no mirror – there is no way on earth you’d get me inside it – no way no how. I don’t know why, but I guess it’s because it seems just like more of a box that way. The bigger the elevator the more chance I have of entering it… Though I am never happy about it. I absolutely will not get into an elevator with a group of people in it, I’ll wait and wait for one which is vacant (if I have no other means to get up a few floors – I’d quite happily take 60 flights of stairs to avoid it, but it’s not always possible). I will never let anyone stand near the buttons on the elevator either. I must be the one standing near the buttons as my friends and family think its “funny” to tease me with the stop button. Newsflash – NOT so funny!

OK next, I can’t talk about elevators any more! Here we have two cliches – clowns and flying. I do NOT like clowns. They aren’t lovable, funny or any other happy thing. Not to me anyway.

Flying… Something I will do, but again will avoid at any cost. I am hopefully going over to New York in September and already I’m prepping myself to deal with the flight haha!

Losing friends and family. I think this is a big one on anyones list and I won’t go to deeply into it for fear of upsetting myself today, but I really couldnt think of anything worse and would happily spend hours inside an elevator situated in a plane with a group of clowns to avoid losing anyone who I love…

So there you have it – some of my fears.

Until next time…

“We must negotiate in fear, but must never fear to negotiate… ” – J.F.K

Brige xx

Dear younger Brigit,

Do NOT touch that cigarette! I mean seriously, don’t. It is a filthy, nasty habit and no matter what you say, it’s a habit you’ll find terribly hard to break in ten years time. Just. Don’t. Do. It.

You didn’t need to stress about moving away from Sydney. I know it seems all unfair to you right now, and mum could have possibly given you more time to digest it, but it’s the best move you’ll ever make. Jindabyne may seem like a horrible, small place but you’ll become a better person for being there. Don’t be mad at mum… Thank her. You’ll meet some of the best friends you’ll ever make there and have a blast. You’ll find creative ways to get in trouble, creative ways to get out of trouble and creative ways to have fun. Your Sydney friends aren’t going anywhere and they never forget you.

You may not believe this right now, but in a few short years you’ll be moving back to Sydney wearing low slung jeans, a backwards cap and your tongue pierced. Even more shocking is the fact that after everything, it’s a move you wont WANT to make. I’m sure you’ve already met Michael. He’s gorgeous and you call him “Wolf-Boy”. STOP dreaming about him! He’s NOT right for you… Yet. BUT you will marry him in the future. I know it seems crazy, but its true. Keep that in mind when you’re moving back to Sydney to finish school (YES you finish school!) because Sydney is where you run into Mic again and start your lives together. Sydney is also where you’ll marry him so enjoy it… But you wont live there forever! You’ll find your way back “home”…

You’ll have your heart broken once. I could tell you how to avoid it but I don’t think I will because although it hurt like hell, you’ll get over it the second you see Michael’s face one night in the future. Don’t be sad and don’t be mad. Look back and remember the good times you had with Adam as there was a lot of them. You’ll think you can never love anyone like you loved him, but trust me, you’ll love Michael MORE! (What, Wolf-Boy?? YES!) The only advice I will give you about Adam is listen to your instincts. If things start to feel off, then don’t try to pretend it’s not happening… Also, don’t give him all the second chances he asked for because it’s not worth it. It never works out in the end and you’ll just get hurt all over again. Don’t worry though, you never stop caring for him as a friend – in fact, you do end up friends!

Be nice to your sister! Oh yes, I forgot to mention to you that you have a little sister. Her name is Amber and she’s unreal. Never forget that when she’s two years old any cramping your style. (By the way, she’s dad’s not mum’s).

I have some upsetting news… And I’ll start it by saying that you should call dad more while you’re not living with him and spend more time with him when you are. When you’re 17 he’ll be diagnosed with Cancer… Leukemia actually. He’s okay… he’s still here with me now, but looking back, there’s just so much more time I could have spent with him and I regret it every day. He’s not trying to ruin your life – he’s trying to make you into a better person… And he succeeds! He’ll move away to New York City and you’ll miss him every single day, so don’t waste one second with him!

Be nice to mum. She’s unreal and you’ll become super close in the future. She’ll become one of your closest friends and you’ll love (almost) every minute you spend together!

I could rattle of a list of things not to do, but I think you’re going to need to make those mistakes… Some will suck, but hey, you’ll deal with it.

Work harder in school. I know you work really hard already but work even harder. Your social life will still be there when you’re done. If you’re thinking about going to med school don’t THINK about it, DO it! It’s something you’ll regret when you’re 25 because it will have been too late then.

OK I think I’ve given you enough clues, facts and details… Just remember who you are and don’t conform! Relax and enjoy the ride… Work hard and play hard too. Have some fun, but don’t have too much fun! Remember your family and be thankful every day for what you have. Life may seem unfair but you have it unbelievably easy right now, I promise.

xx

When we were in Terrigal we came across this awesome shop called ‘Typo’. It’s seriously my kind of shop! I lovvveee notebooks, office stuff and all sorts of things like that… I was in heaven strolling around there looking at everything. The decor in the shop was beautiful and I wish I’d had my camera with me to take some photos of it. We didn’t end up buying much from there (as Mic kept reminding me I don’t need any more notebooks etc!) but I did notice that everything in there was actually very reasonably priced!

I was hoping I would find that Typo had an online store, but alas, the web address tricked me and there is no online store. (check out the website here)

I did end up buying a portable coffee mug (as I have this weird thing where I prefer to drink tea and coffee out of take away mugs rather than real mugs, but cant buy them all the time!) and Adam bought their “OMG WTF” mug with suits him to a tee!

If you haven’t already walked into a Typo store, you definitely should – but be warned, you WILL want to buy everything!

“Love built on beauty, soon as beauty dies…” – John Donne

Until next time…

Brige xx

As you may or may not have noticed, my posts on the blog have been a little MIA for the past few weeks… Mic had his first time off work in over a year and a half so we decided to head up to Terrigal for a few days to visit my brother (who also, over the past five years has become one of Mic’s closest friends). It was nice to go up there and just hang out. The only thing that was planned was that the boys would go on a fishing expedition whilst I got some work done (which didn’t happen but that’s another story…)

It ended up raining pretty much the entire time we were there (which suits me fine as I love the rain) but the boys were less than pleased as their fishing plans didn’t exactly play out the way they’d hoped. Instead we gave Adam’s fish tank a makeover and just all hung out together, went to a few dinners and looked around Terrigal. On the first night we were there we went to Sydney to have dinner with my other brother, Nathan , his fiancee Jess and my Granny. It was SO good to see everyone, especially Gran who I haven’t seen in a long time. She’s just so special and I really wish I got to see her more often. I realise every time I see her just how much I miss her!

Driving home from Terrigal was quite interesting… The morning we were leaving, Mic’s mum called us and told us maybe we should consider staying an extra day as they were warning people not to drive where we live due to severe weather. We left anyway and driving the first 3 hours it was 32 degrees, super sunny and a beautiful day. We laughed to each other about the ’severity’ of the weather and kept driving. As we approached Lake George we saw the change. The temp dropped to 26 degrees and there was a black line in the sky changing from blue and beautiful to dark and ominous. There were even murders of crows circling – it was like a cartoon with the sunny little town and the haunted castle on top of a hill with dark clouds circling the turrets and ravens flying overhead! As we drove through the ‘line’ the temp instantly dropped from 26 to 16 degrees in a matter of seconds. Minutes later it was raining so hard we couldn’t see a foot in front of us on the road and the temp dropped down to 10 degrees. The weather continued like that pretty much the entire way home and it was scary!

Aaaanyway, we made it home safely (and picked up three very muddy dogs along the way!) It’s been so nice to have Mic home, though I do admit, I found it harder to work all day with him here as I wanted to spend time with him! Today he’s gone back to work and I miss him already! At least he will have this weekend off…

I’m going to love you and leave you now with a new quote and a few pics from Terrigal…

“There are no rules of architecture for a castle in the clouds…” – G.K Chesterton

Until next time…

Brige xx

I have finally got the first thing on my dream board and will have to mark it off with a big fat tick! I am loooooving my Amazon Kindle SO much! I honestly can’t put it down. I really thought – although I wanted one with all of my might – that in the end I would enjoy it but still miss books. Books create a romance with the reader. You love the feel of the pages as you flip them… BUT! Not once have I even thought of this whilst reading my Kindle! I am very shocked at how little it’s bothered me to give up that romance. I am now obsessed with it and have read waaaay tooooo much so far! I haven’t even thought about watching television once since I bought it. Hubby even bought me the first season of One Tree Hill the other day (because Lizzie told him to!) and I haven’t even started it as I cant stop reading! Maybe I will put the Kindle down tonight and watch a few episodes of it… Or then again, maybe I wont haha!

Here are some pictures of my awesome new toy…

My Kindle in her box

Pull tab on Kindle box

Snug inside the box – already powered on

Amazon Kindle cover

Kindle with light

“There are no scientific tests for race… Blood is blood, and bone is bone. Race is a con game. Don’t play…” – Will Shetterly

Until next time…

Brige xx

Just added the blog to Bloglovin, so remember to follow me and pass it onto your friends!!

Follow my blog with bloglovin

“Human subtlety will never devise an invention more beautiful, more simple or more direct than does nature because in her inventions nothing is lacking and nothing is superfluous…” – Leonardo da Vinci

Until next time…

Brige xx

OK so yesterday was much like the day before so I sat down and read the first book in the House of Night series by P.C. and Kristin Cast, Marked. I was actually looking forward to reading this book and really looking for a long series I could get into, but alas, this was not the book I thought it would be. Although I finished the book in one day, don’t get the impression that it was because I loved it so much I couldn’t put it down… It was more the need to finish it so I could move on to my next book – which by the way is not the second in the House of Night Series.

The thing is, I actually enjoyed the story: A world where vampyres (with a ‘y’) exist amongst society, aren’t bitten to be created but rather “Marked” (chosen) and must attend a ‘vampyre finishing school’ and either make the 4 year transformation from fledgling to vampyre or die if their body rejects the change. The idea is great in my eyes and I can really appreciate anything with imagination. It wasn’t the story I disliked about this book, it was the writing…

I found it so hard to relate to the very immature babbling of an adult obviously trying to write how she feels a 16 year old would… But I have been 16 and I don’t ever remember writing, nor talking the way this book was written. The overuse of brackets also drove me utterly insane – I couldn’t go one paragraph without the use of brackets and usually something very immature and totally unnecessary written in them. Here one I thought was an absolute doozy:

“She wasnt thin like the freak girls who puked and starved themselves into what they thought was Paris Hilton chic. (‘Thats Hott.’ Yeah okay, whatever, Paris.) … And she had great boobs. (I wish I had great boobs) … Speaking of boobs – I was totally sounding like one. (Boob… hee hee). (Page 51, Marked: House of Night)

The brackets (and complete silliness of justifying everything written in them) drove me crazy (I mean crazy) because it was totally unnecessary (I mean, like… totally) when you could have either left the silly details out (would be a good thing) or just not used brackets (but brackets are so fun!).

Other than that, the use of words like “poopie” and “boobies” also made me groan. 3 year olds speak like that, not 16 year olds…

I hate to compare this to Twilight but I will anyway – Twilight was an international hit, as was House of Night, but I felt that everyone could read Twilight and relate to it and read its words without groaning every 5 minutes… From 14 year olds to grandmothers, Twilight was maybe a young adult novel, but was something everyone could enjoy. Marked is a different story… It was written clearly sounding like a 16 year old wrote it – and I’m sure that was the intention – but for this reason I found it very hard to relate to. A less dumbed down version of this book would have been brilliant! I loved the story and really rate it, but the immature wording throughout the novel really bugged me. I enjoy reading young adult novels as they are generally relatable, but I love when the characters are at least a little intelligent, not justifying every bit of info they know and relating it to stars like Leonardo DiCaprio.

What I didn’t understand was that this book was unsuitable for younger readers because it speaks of some pretty sexual stuff for the younger crowd, uses some swearing etc, but is also written as though a 13 year old should be reading it. That was quite confusing for me as I feel that if a character is mature enough to witness blow jobs, understand the passionate and sexual nature of things and feel those things, then she is mature enough to not use words like “poopie”.

I was absolutely certain that I wouldnt read the next books in the House of Night series… CERTAIN! But I did really enjoy the story and think I may at least give one more a go as I want to see what happens next…

“It is better to be beautiful than good… But it is better to be good than ugly..” – Oscar Wilde

Until next time…

Brige xx

OK well we’re having like a crazy monsoon here – I swear, it’s nuts. I have never seen rain like this before and my street is no longer a street, but a river. Due to this, we’ve had some electrical issues so I have settled into reading a few books until the rain eases and life returns to normal. Yesterday I read Fallen by Lauren Kate. I finished the entire thing in one day and I actually enjoyed it. I have read some good and bad reviews on this book on the net thus far and most of the bad reviews are coming from Twilight haters… But truth is, Fallen, just like Twilight is a typical young adult love story with strange fantasy elements. There are no vampires, no werewolves etc so in my eyes, the similarity between the books are that is is a mythical love story for young adults – just like many before Twilight and I’m sure many after. I enjoyed reading the Twilight Saga but people really must stop comparing every single young adult book to it these days. Twilight was not the first of it’s kind, it was just insanely popular, so get over it people!

I got the recommendation to read this book from my friend Lizzie (book club extraordinaire!) and I’m glad I read it. I will also be reading the next in the series when it comes out later this year. If you liked Twilight, you will like this book – not because its the same, or because there’s Vampires (because there’s not), but because the story is relatable, enjoyable, mythical and easy to read just like Twilight.

I have heard Disney has picked up this series and will make it into a motion picture… I hope they do a good job of that as the whole time I was reading I was imagining who would play the characters and how they would do it. I will be interested to see this movie as I was quite disappointed with the Twilight movies thus far – the books were great, the movies were definitely average and did not encapsulate the way the books did. Such a shame really, as they could have been extraordinary like the Harry Potter movie transformations.

Anyway, I’m off, my lights are beginning to dim and I’m assuming another blackout will follow shortly. Isn’t the cover of Fallen beautiful?

“”It’s never too late to be who you might have been…” – George Eliot

Brige xx

ME!!

Michael is amazing. He does a lot of things which tend to annoy me but out of the blue he will do something so sweet and lovely. The other night when I was taking a shower he left a flower on my desk for me… Then today when I woke up and he’d already left for work, I found more roses from our garden on my desk. To top it off, he came home today on his morning break at 10.30 and bought me a lovely coffee and bacon and eggs! PLUS he said to me not to worry about dinner tonight, he would take care of it and is going to make a fresh salad with veggies from our garden and some chicken. I couldn’t even ask for more! What a great start to the day!! THIS is why this man has my heart Random acts of kindness get me every time…

Flowers from the other night:

Flowers from this morning:

“And ever has it been that love knows not its own depth until the hour of separation… ” – Kahlil Gibran

Until next time…

Brige xx

What life will be like in five or 10 years time… We are at the point in our lives where we are talking about having children (of the human variety) and I have finally realised what it means to be ‘ready’ to make that change. I have known I want kids for my entire life and have watched so many of my close friends fall pregnant and give birth and I had always wondered if I was ready too? I have only just realised that I haven’t been ready until right now.

Not long ago I was speaking with a friend of mine who’s 12 month old son was sick. She was saying that she would do anything to take it away from him and it rips her heart out to see him like that… And at that point I got a pang… And I longed to feel like that for someone. Not just anyone, as I do for my husband and family, but someone who was mine and someone who I had no choice but to love and care for. That’s the point that I realised I am ready for the unknown.

When Mic and I got married my family made a bet on how soon I’d fall pregnant. I won that bet as its been over 12 months which is what I said haha! I need to claim that $1000 HAHA!

Anyway, I guess I’m just rambling about desires etc but there is a reality to it all also. I am constantly told by people I know and don’t know that we are far too young to have kids. I don’t believe we are too young, as I assume I just don’t feel as young as people see me. Example: When I was 18 I thought I was super old and mature. Looking at 18 year olds now I am shocked that I thought that of myself! So I do see where they are coming from but I am not sure how much of a difference that makes to me.

Michael wants babies more than anything which is actually a lovely feeling. I see so many people who are afraid to ask their husbands to begin a family for fear that they will say no, or men who just bluntly refuse to have kids “until they are 40″, so I am a very lucky girl indeed!

Anyhow, I’m going to go watch Grey’s Anatomy with Mic in bed – he’s finally gotten into it yay!

“Who ever loved that loved not at first sight?” – Christopher Marloe

Brige xx